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10:44 a.m. - 2008-12-04
sharing the news
THis is a public service announcement.

Pregnant people like to tell their friends that they are pregnant. It's really a bummer when they already know.

See, here is the problem with all of this stuff. When you are pregnant, in the early stages, you are cautious. You are bursting to tell EVERYONE under the sun, but you are also nervous because, let's face it, not every pregnancy makes it to term. In the first trimester, you hem and haw over who you should tell. You really do want to tell every single person you meet, but every person you tell, you pause and consider that if something goes wrong you are going to have to "untell" that person.

So, in light of this, you carefully consider who you tell and how soon.

The other thing is that telling someone who cares about you that you are pregnant is really, really fun. It's just about the only good thing about being pregnant. You're sick and tired and moody and kind of fat. But at least you get to share very exciting news. Until you discover that someone else has gone ahead and done that for you.

Here's the deal, People. You can tell people I don't have a personal relationship with. You can probably tell your mom and you can definitely tell your spouse. But please! Stop telling people that I would like to tell. I would have already told them myself except for that whole thing I just told you about, how I'm kind of nervous to tell people. It's not like I forgot to tell them or I didn't get around to it because I don't care if I personally tell them. I'm trying to WAIT to make sure everything is ok with this baby.

But now, because of anxiety over this issue, even though I'm not really ready to tell everyone under the sun, I had to send out a bunch of emails last night to people that I wanted to make sure hear it from me first.

Look, if you're in doubt, just ask me. I'll be happy to let you know if there is someone that I would like to tell myself.

Now I will pause and say that in the past, I may have been guilty of this myself. I can't actually think of any incidents of this happening, but I wouldn't be surpised. Ooh, wait, yes, I do have one. This was horrible! I accidentally let a huge group of people know via mass email about a friend's pregnancy - it was an accident - I really wasn't thinking that some of the people might not have known. Ok, see - this illustrates the need for this public service announcement even more.

If I had known that doing so was essentially stealing one of the coolest parts of pregnancy from some poor, bloated, irritable, sleepless, wine-less, beer-less, feta cheese-less woman, I certainly would not have.

If you have done this to me, and some of you have, don't worry - I'm not mad. Just quit doing it, ok?

I hope this clarifies the issue for friends and family of pregnant women everywhere, or for the 7 or 8 people that read this blog.

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