11:03 p.m. - 2007-03-29
night of terror
Last night on Lost, there was a spider incident. Oh, Husband, if you want to watch this on TiVo, don't read this because it's a spoiler of sorts.
Basically on the show there was this mysterious situation where two people died and it turned out that it was due to a poisonous spider's bite. Grrr! I felt creepy crawly all night and just KNEW that it had been too long until I had experienceda spider incident of my own.
Well, tonight, after a nice dinner and a few drinks with Haley. I came home around 10 pm to three hungry kitties and and and...a SPIDER in that little crease between the ceiling and the wall in the kitchen. I quickly armed myself with Formula 409 and a wad of paper towels the size of Kansas. I squirted and drowned him and as he slowly tumbled legs over legs over head over legs, down the light blue stream of cleaning fluid leaking down the wall, I promptly squished him and flicked him (not TOUCHING it mind you) into the sink, turned on the HOT water, and ran the disposal for about 3 minutes.
My relief was short lived though. I happen to know that spiders come in groups. If you find one, and look around for long enough, you'll find another. And I did. A slightly smaller one, in the living room.
See! THIS IS WHY HUSBANDS SHOULD NEVER TRAVEL ON BUSINESS!
This one was on the ceiling. I turned on the light, which was a fatal mistake. The light and fan are on one switch. I flipped the light switch, took aim with my 409, and it slowly descended down from the ceiling, which I was expecting. I was expecting it to slowly descend down to the ground where he would meet death by paper towel. But, oh so uhnfortunately, what happened is that after he descended about 4 inches, the fan airstream caught him up and he began swinging around violently on his little butt thread. I screamed in sheer terror at the thought of him being flung ONTO me and blindly fumbled for the light switch, yelling "Noooo! Go off fan, Go offfff!!!!" despite the fact that I was the only one in the room, nay, the house. I lost sight of it swaying down, down, down. I panicked, yelled, scared the cats out of their minds. Eventually, miraculously I caught sight of him again; he was almost all the way to the carpet. I sprang into action, grabbed him up with the paper towel wad and ran over to the sink and flung him into a soap and water filled cereal bowl. This was then dumped into the drain and the disposal was utilized once again to make spider juice.
I miss my husband. Even if he does give me withering looks at my spider freak-outs. At least he does the squishing for me...
