2:02 p.m. - 2005-10-13
All you need is love...and Marge
So I went to this workshop on work place relating. Like, getting along with co-workers, customers, etc. It was a pretty good workshop. But as ironic as it may be, the presenter was rude, defensive and brash for a fair amount of the morning. At one point, shortly after she had described to us the right way to "delegate" (which involved something like being nice, polite and asking for someone's help) she came over to me and in a hissing voice, INSISTED that I go immediately and get her a dry-erase board. NOW. And then, unbelievably, she went out a side-door and was locked out for about 1.5 seconds. She solved this little situation by BANGING (boom boom boom) on the glass with her fist, while there were people a mere step away from the door who could easily have heard her with just a non-disruptive one-finger tap or maybe (maybe) the old two knuckle knock if they were all hearing impaired, blind and distracted.
In other news, I am going on a retreat. With 40 strangers. Roughly 20 girls and 20 guys, I believe. We will be camping and "getting to know each other." Hopefully it isn't going to get all "Temptation Islandy" or "Laguna Beachy" or any other reality show that sends a number of young people out into the woods to drink together. Honestly, I just hope to God there isn't one of those rope courses.
I am deathly afraid of rope courses. Not because I am fearful of falling or I am afraid to try stuff like that. I mean, come on, you know me, you didn't really think that was it. My mother would have my head if I was afraid of anything like that. I am allowed exactly one irrational fear and that is spiders and she isn't too keen on that one anyway. No, this fear is of a different sort. I am afraid of being split up by gender, put into teams with girls I don't know, and having to do one of those awful "obstacles" where everyone has to get up over some wall or onto some high structure. I am neither a high jumper nor a skilled climber nor one who is easily lifted. I am often afraid I will be thrust unwittingly into such a situation and somehow, being a good sport and decent lifter, will end up the last one standing on the ground while everyone else is up on the thing or on the other side or whatever. It will appear to be my fault that we lost even though I single handedly gave perfect "legs-up" to 7 former sorority girls who still, at age 28, shop in the pre-teen department of Macy's. Worse yet is my fear that people will attempt to hoist me off the ground. Imagine being pulled 8 feet off the ground by those sorority girls who just might have a lost-earring emergency as you dangle helplessly. (Omigawd you guys these are EXPENSIVE! Find it!) It is in those moments that all you want in your life is a gigantic construction-worker lesbian named Marge.
