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11:07 a.m. - 2005-08-24
fore!
The other day was my organization's Golf Outing. I've discovered in planning this event and being involved with several others, that Golf Outings are basically a chance for middle aged men to 1. not go to work. 2. wear shorts. 3. get drunk 4. drive drunk (golf carts are both fun and scary) and 5. cover their wedding rings with that CONVENIENT left handed glove so if you are the recipient of their boob-drooling, you don't know whether you should be a little bit mad (in the case of them being single) or infuriated (in the case that they are married.)

My job is not really all that important. But it has a fancy title and it impresses people. Because I am relatively young, and have relatively big boobs, and I was accompanied by my intern who is even younger, with even more impressive boobs, I think that the men in the golf outing thought we were sorority girls with nothing better to do but hand out water bottles and take pictures of the golf foursomes.

It was really really great to see them stare, salivate, make a comment about frisking us, and then introduce myself. "Hi, I'm the membership director for the chambers of commerce. Thanks so much for coming out today."

Not that they were all oggling. Some of them are really diplomatic and respectful gentlemen. And some of them had the decency to be embarrassed when their golf buddies were acting like high school sophomores.

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