8:36 a.m. - 2004-05-24
Somebody's got a case of the mondays
This morning, my mother calls me, well before 8am, to give me a status report on her foot injury and her recent trip to the doctor. This was not a wise move on her part. I certainly do care about the status of her foot, however, I can barely remember my name before the morning's first cup of coffee, let alone have the presence of mind to ask thoughful questions about discomfort levels. Sigh. She politely hangs up on me.
When I pull myself one notch up out of the morning fog, I call her back and use every ounce of will to cheerfully get through the conversation. She was actually pretty gracious with me and didn't give me a hard time, but it still was painful. I just can't "chat" before 9am. Is this unreasonable? No, it is not. My mother is not a morning person either.
So, I get to the office and after the door clicks shut, there is precisely a nanosecond of silence before my boss is up out of her chair and is bouncing and yapping at me so much like an overly excited boston terrier, I almost laughed, but was much too annoyed and bewildered at how much energy one person could have on a monday morning. I had so much been hoping that arriving a little early would allow me the necessary half hour of silence and darkness (my coworkers like to have every flourescent light in the office on at all times) to let the morning fog lift slowly and naturally. However, my boss has apparently been here all weekend, and is just dying to connect with a human being. I am working on adjusting my expectations.
Now, at the moment, my co-workers are raising their voices and gushing about some television show that was on last night. I really can't believe anyone is this chipper on a monday before 9am. Don't get me wrong, two cups of coffee and an hour later, I'll be cheerful and free spirited too, but isn't there some sort of law about being allowed to shoot people with tranquilizer guns when they break the Monday Morning Rules.
1. No raising of one's voice.
2. No asking of complex questions.
3. No telling stories that are important or special enough to require others to comment beyond a grunt or slow nodding of the head.
4. No conversations that become overly animated or jokes that require others to laugh out of politeness.
5. DEFINITELY no inquiring about other people's moods or poking fun in an effort to lighten things up or making reference to it being "monday." Clearly, this will only worsen the situation.
6. NO STEALING OF ANYONE'S COFFEE!!! I am not kidding this just happened. My co-worker just filled up her mug with the coffee I just brewed. You have got to be kidding me.
